Love and Depression
by Naoto Love
Summary: Gray has been depressed, hung up on his love for Natsu, and hiding it pretty well, until tonight... Warnings: Contains Yaoi, self harm, and cursing, include the F bomb a few times. Rating: T One-Shot


**_Hi everyone, this is Naoto Love here. I am going out of my comfort zone here by posting two things I'm not familiar with. A one -shot, and a Fairy Tale Fanfic. The pairing here will be GrayXNatsu, and involves a hint of self harm. If you want this to become multiple chapters instead of a One-Shot, just say it in the reviews. Until then, see you at the end of this. YAOI Don't like? Don't read._**

Thoughts:_ Italics are thoughts, or thinking._

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tale, so yeah. :3_**

XxxX

Gray POV

The raven just laid there, staring at his ceiling, feeling the multiple recent, and old, sting sensations on his arms.

Cuts.

Not from a mission or anything, but self-made. He had been covering them in skin toned makeup, making them invisible to his 'friends'. He no longer strips, well not as much as before. Once a week, sometimes twice.

He never took off his white jacket anymore, not that anyone really notices. Which is good, he wouldn't want people to know.

"Natsu-" He moaned, rubbing himself through his pants. "No... I can't think of him like, that, anymore... It's wrong," He then remembered the time he asked Natsu how he felt about homosexuality.

He didn't like it.

Well, he didn't dislike it, but he said he'd never be gay, which tied Gray's stomach into a knot. That was a few months ago, though, and he has been cutting before that, way before that.

He ran his fingers through his hair.

"I need to think Lucy, or Erza even," He told his brain, which for some reason was stuck on Natsu.

He didn't want to be gay, hell, he was only attracted to Natsu, maybe he was bi? He loves tits, and would gladly have sex with Lucy and Erza at any time... But it was different with Natsu.

"Natsu!" Gray's thoughts were interrupted by his climax in his pants. The raven looked to his right, at his clock, 12:37 AM. "Damn, not even ten minutes..." He told himself, as he slipped off his pants. _I could never please Natsu_. He thought,slipping on some pajama pants.

He then heard a knock on the door.

"G-Gray?" He heard from outside the door. "It's me, Natsu."

"O-oh, it's open!" The ice wizard yelled just loud enough to hear, which was followed by the door opening. "Gray, I need to talk to someone," The pinkette said, as he walked through Gray's bedroom door. "Why me?" Gray asked in an I-don't-care tone.

"Well, I've got nobody else to talk to," Natsu admitted, with a slight smile. "Oh," Gray muttered. "Then, speak."

"Right, well... I've got these feelings, for a certain someone.." Natsu admitted, as the raven's eyes shot off a slight glimmer of hope.

**Natsu POV**

"She got a name?" The raven asked. _Well, it's not really a she..._ Natsu thought.

"Huh? Oh y-yeah she does," He stuttered. _Well, you and them are very close. _

"Who," The ice wizard asked, voice slightly saddened, but Natsu acted like he didn't notice, like always.

"It's, It's... Lucy!" Natsu looked into his lap. Dammit, _I pussied out again._.. "Lucy huh? She's really nice, and has a nice rack," Gray laughed, but the pinkette could sense sadness in his tone.

_Why is he so..._"Gray, a-are you alright?" The dragon slayer asked, concerned.

"Yeah haha, why wouldn't I be?" The raven continued a laugh, putting his hand behind his head, revealing his wrist... His wrists..

"G-Gray?" The pinkette glanced at the little amount of wrist visible, seeing thin , dark red scars.

"Gray!" Natsu yelled, grabbing the ice slayer's wrist quickly. "Wha-" Gray shouted, a bit startled.

Natsu lifted the sleeve, revealing all the scars on his forearm. "Oh... My... God..." Natsu looked up into Gray's eyes seeing some tears coming out. "Who..." _Natsu_ began.

Natsu looked back down at the wrist, seeing some of them were fresh, like from the past hour. "Gray... D-did you..." The Dragon slayer looked back up into his eyes. Natsu couldn't find anything else to say, as Gray yanked his arm back.

**Gray POV**

_Shit!_ Natsu was staring at his wrist. _Shit! Got to get him away!_ Gray swiftly pulled his wrist from the pinkettes grasp.

"Gray... D-did you..." The voice was cold, and shaky. _Fuck fuck fuck!_ more tears began forming in his eyes. "Natsu, I'm sorry..." He gulped out.

"My ass."

There it is, the anger Gray had expected from Natsu if he found out. "Why...?" The question came out as calm as to be expected, maybe a bit less calm than that. "Because... I'm depressed..." Gray tried to be as vague as he could.

_Don't ask more questions Natsu, please..._

"Why are you depressed?"

**Natsu POV**

The dragon slayer understood the delicateness of the situation, so he has to try to be calm. "Why are you depressed?" Natsu asked as calm as he could manage, but it came out more rough and muffled.

_No, I can't cry..._ Natsu thought with tears on the verge of breaking out.

"Because, people only talk to me when the need me to do something for them, they don't notice me, my pain, the sacrifices I have had to make..." Gray let out a sob, "And you don't care for me," He finished.

Wha- "Gray, of course I care for you, we've been friends for like, te-" Natsu began.

"No! You don't care like I do... Natsu, I-I... I love you," Gray shouted out, looking down, tears tapping his wooden floor.

_What... He loves me? That's why he asked me how I felt about it... after that I started to fall for him, myself... Dammit, did I cause this!_ "Gray," Natsu just followed his instinct, and hugged Gray, wrapping his arms around and holding him.

"Gray, stop crying, please," tears began falling down the pinkette's cheeks. _Yeah, I'm one to talk..._

"N-Natsu."

The dragon slayer met eyes with the icy teen's. "Promise me you wont, hurt yourself, again,"

"Nat-"

"Promise me, please, I can't stand to see you hurt, because... Because I, love you too..." Gray nodded his head, as Natsu began stroking his cheek. I can't believe all this is happening, has happened... Soon enough, he felt Gray fall asleep in his arms.

With a thin smile, Natsu place Gray onto his bed, and cuddled up next to him.

On the verge of sleeping, Natsu eventually whispered:

"Goodnight, Baka."

XxxX

Hi again, did you enjoy that? I enjoyed writing it. :3 leave a review if you'd like, and tell me if I should continue? I'm satisfied with this being a one-shot though, but if you want more, let me know.


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